Merry Christmas 2015

 I gained weight over our winter and went up to 105.9kgs (232.98 lb). I am a bit mad at myself as I intellectually know why I did but it still happened. I am in the process of slowly grabbing the weight loss back. Once again emotional eating and the inbuilt need for comfort ( carbs) food over winter has made the difference. My mother is ending up in hospital with heart problems (CHF and AF) every few months at the moment. She also had a severe bowel infection caught while she was on holiday.

I visited my daughter and her family (my grandies) in March. Mum visited her family in Palmerston North. While she was down there she drank infected water. The infection she caught is known to kill babies and elderly people. She was fairly close at one stage but my battling mother pulled through once more, thank god.

Mid year my brother came into our flat one day and asked how long it would take us to pack if we were to shift? Could we do it in a week? I responded we could be packed in 4 days if needed and if he could keep boxes, tape and bubble wrap coming. He came back with 25 cardboard cartons. We were on the move. Together with my mother and daughter we set to. I listed the contents and box number, prepared more boxes by taping them up and stacked filled , sealed boxes. Mum wrapped the fragile things and told my daughter where they needed positioning in the box.  It was a production line. My brother would come every few days and take a carload to his garage. There was a hiatus 2/3 of the way through to settle when we needed to be out so he could put the flat on the market, if we all stayed at his place  for a few weeks and when our new place could be occupied. Mid-July to his place and mid-August to our new place in the end.

We have been busy sorting out our new home and the slightly larger garden. It is lovely here. The distance to town is a bit longer but still walkable. If the rainy weather makes me not want to do that walk then there is a bus stop just over the road. I am using the walk to the library in town as my exercise. We no longer have a gym I can go to daily until I save enough to afford the membership at a gym down the road from us.Tthat is a goal I am aiming for early next year. I can do other forms of exercise at home till then.

The pictures show the outside of our new house and the bigger garden. Lawn moving takes a few minutes with an electric mover. We frequently move the planters around so the best flowers can be seen from the sitting room where Mum spends most of her days. I am the person with the red velvet top second from the left. The KIP (Knitting in Public) group I attend knitted a castle with Knight, Princess, Page and two horses for the Botany Library to use in their Storytimes.It was a thank you for them having us use a large room at the front as our meeting area on a fortnightly basis. 30+ women and 1 man can be a little noisy at times when a few of them are deaf..

 I have had a good year in my 2 writing groups though. We are attempting to get a group of short stories together to publish next year. One of our Saturday group published a children's book recently called "Rabbit's Big Idea" by Elise Da Silva. She launched it at Botany Library as that is where she went to our writing group. She got up the courage to do this book. I did Nanowrimo again this year but with a lot of other things happening only got to 25,000 words. I will finish that book though. My niece got 55,000+ words so my wish for her in the coming year is that she does something with it.

I have my grandchildren in the country at the moment though they are mostly visiting their other grandmother and their father. We went out to the airport to welcome them here and got an hour of time to cuddle and talk. They have both grown heaps even from when I saw them in March. Once again a young male in out family is so much taller than me. Genetics will out; my younger brother is 6ft 3 inches and their grandfather( Paul) was the shortest in his family at 6 ft. One of his brothers was 6ft 5 in.

  So I wish everyone a MERRY CHRISTMAS, fun and games with your family, joyful eating, ravishing exercise, no weight gain and JOY, PEACE, LOVE, GOODWILL, CHARITY AND HOPE for a better world in the year to come.

Time I got back into the weight loss mindset - 102.1kgs 18 February 2015

Physical

I am a bit heavier than my last post so, yes, you can gain weight after having weight loss surgery. You eat things that you shouldn't and you nibble. When I talked to my GP about it his response was; for me to eat until I actually was sick as I might start to realize I was eating too much then.He might have a point there as being sick is something I really detest. I hold my nose as I am sick because I hate some ending up in there. I haven't been able to make myself do that. I need to take the Garcinia supplement more regularly as I don't feel like eating as often when I do take it. I also need to eat more protein as I think my body is saying that I need more and that is why I want to nibble. Time to try new food and adjust my diet for more protein, less carbs. My body seems to work best with that ratio.

I am getting back to the gym. I was pleased when I went the other day that I could do almost as well as I was before my hand operation. The regular walking seems to have helped keep my muscle tone. I was a bit achy as I gave myself a good run through but it was a lot less painful than it was when I first started. Half the reason I haven't been going is I am staying awake too late at night reading or writing (this blog and some creative writing that I would love to see in print one day). I may need to suck it up for a couple of days and just be tired until my body gets used to waking earlier and going to sleep earlier. My writing will have to be done either before or just after the gym or later in the day. Saying that this is being done at 11.34 pm at night so not keeping to my ideal tonight.

Mental

Mentally I still need to be able to limit my comfort or stress eating. I find if I am accomplishing something that the desire to eat lessens. Positive reinforcements and acknowledgements of how far I have come do help. For others to notice and make positive remarks helps but the person who needs to be mentally in agreement with my body is me. I need to want this weight loss. I need to know I am the same person, large or small, and that I am the best me I can be at this time. The size difference in clothes I used to wear and clothes I can now wear is a way I reinforce to myself how far I have come. I used to wear a NZ size 24-26 and now, depending on the brand, I am wearing size 16-18 (jeans still size 20 but that shop cuts slimmer). I got a buzz the other day when I could walk into "Shanton" and buy clothes that I now fit.  A year ago I didn't even bother going in because they were all too small for me.

Creativity

I have a friend who has fought breast cancer twice and recently she put a YouTube post https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lgHuYICfxdQ for a scarf that forms the ribbon shape as part of the pattern. You can see the video and follow the link to a free pattern or two at  http://www.naztazia.com/ .I have done a scarf for her and one for her wife so I hope they get joy from them. I love the fact that some-one was willing to put the pattern on the web for free. This same pattern with the appropriate colour change could be used to all the charities that use ribbons in their fund raising efforts.

I crocheted a mohair rug for my mother as she was so rapt in the ones I did for Hospice. She liked the lightness and warmth that even in summer was useful. Her duvet was becoming too hot to use in these summer nights but this rug was just enough to keep her comfortable and light enough to throw off if she got too warm. My mother ended up in hospital recently with heart and kidney problems and when it became obvious she would be in for more that a day or two we took her rug in to her. She finds the air conditioning in hospital too cold for her so she was delighted to have it to use. She was the envy of the other 3 ladies in her room. Yes, she is home and feeling better now.

Family

 My newest grandson. I am hoping to go and visit soon so must get the money out and put it into my daughter's Visa A/c so she can go online and book the flight for me. I don't want him to be walking before I see him. We sent a parcel off the other day with a lot of little things we had picked up for him and the other family members. Fun to do but a bit expensive on a regular basis. It is one way of them knowing we are thinking of them. I would phone regularly but like most younger people today they only have a mobile phone and that makes it very expensive to do more often.

Goals for this month

• Use the gym 4-6 times weekly
• Lose 2 kilos
• Go to sleep earlier and wake up relaxed after 7-8 hours sleep
• Write daily
• Do crafts daily
• Read daily
• Get a few more swims in before the water gets too cool in our pool on site

Back to losing weight finally. 99.8 kgs instead of 101.9 kgs (219.56 lb not 223.52 lb) 8/12/14

For so long I have stayed near 101- 102 kgs that I thought that was the end of my weight loss journey but recently I have been heading down again and I am so happy about that.

Possible factors for the weight loss

• Longer days with more sunlight lessens the desire for Carbohydrates and comfort foods.
• Walking as a form of exercise for an hour a day.
• Finding something that gives me joy to do
• Eating more salads and coleslaw, less puddings
• Trialing the herbal extract Garcinia to see if it lessens my desire to eat (YES)
• Distracting myself with things I enjoy (writing, crochet, reading)
• Being busy doing things to get ready for Xmas (wrapping and sending parcels - a walk to do that), putting up Xmas tree and lights, baking)
• Washing walls and ceilings throughout the apartment (next; scrub carpets)
• Engrossing books to read that so involve you in the story that external things disappear

These are some of the things that brought me joy recently:

1. Finishing a fourth knee rug for Hospice -  made out of mohair so it is soft, light and warm. This one was larger so that a man with longer legs or wider body could use it and in darker colours so it wasn't too girly.
2. Growing beautiful scented flowers, and nice vegetables to pick and eat from the containers on our front patio (purple flower is heliotrope, with a beautiful vanilla scent).
3. Having unexpected visitors from overseas that you loved catching up with.
4. Muscle cars, muscle cars for you to see at the carols in the square.
5. Singing along with the singers at Carols in the Square last Thursday

My Goals for December:

1. Lose 3 kilos
2. Eat a beautiful and healthy Xmas dinner
3. Enjoy my family over the holiday season
4. Enjoy having my eldest daughter back with us from the 12th December
5. Talking to my younger daughter as she gets to grips with her 3rd child born recently, as the others are so much older
   
6. Be thankful for my family and friends
7. Edit my Nanowrimo words into something much better, print and bind it for my daughter and her family.

101 kgs so slowly going down again 1/12/14

I have news. I am a grandmother again for the 3rd time. Cooper Stephen Schweitzer was born at 8.02 pm last night NSW, Australia time at Tweed Hospital, Tweed Heads. He was 4.4 kgs (9.68 lb) and 59 cms long so a large baby. He faced posterior so labour was on and off since last Friday and in the end his heart started to slow so they did an emergency caesarian operation to get him out. He, of course, is gorgeous. My congratulations to my daughter and her family. She is a bit sore but it sounds like the drugs are still helping.

I was concerned about her over the weekend but distracted myself by completing Nanowrimo. In the last 24 hours I wrote over 11,000 words to complete the 50,000 word target to become a WINNER. I am a WINNER, yay. 3rd time to do it, first time to complete it. I still have more writing to do on the story then a lot of editing and insertion of photos etc but will take a few days break first to give my hands a rest.

Weight wise I can't do a lot of my exercises in the gym for a while as had my hand operated on for RSI last Thursday. Yes, it is letting me know as I used it too much yesterday. I kept forgetting and used it to type. I can do long walks and I have been doing daily walks so that is my exercise style for the next couple of weeks. Every bit helps. I may try garcinia herbal supplement as well and see if that makes any difference. I still crave sweets and Xmas is coming so I shall see if it does take away that craving and help with fat removal. Watch this space to see the result. Trying MyFitnessPal but Nanowrimo took up my time so must get back to using it. It helped me track food, exercise and breakdown of food properties.

Congratulations on high points in your life too.

Almost Guy Fawkes night. 101.6 kgs still

I am stable in weight at the moment . I managed to get myself to the gym three times last week but did do some very long walks during most days. I stopped taking my vitamins as now my body is back in balance I react strongly to pyridoxine. That B Vitamin makes me feel very hungry when I take it. I am slowly feeling less hungry and am taking back the snacking I was doing, a lot. I can take a longer time before the desire to eat distracts me. I actually use distraction also.

Nanowrimo has restarted and I am already over 5000 words done towards the 50,000 endpoint word count to be a winner. If I included journal writing and blogging I would probably be closer to the 10,000 mark in the last few days. I am writing what I remember (and my mum) of my younger daughter's life. She does not remember a lot of her childhood and I want to jog her memory. I will put photos in it later and print it out/ bind it and give it to her. She can keep it for herself only or let her children have a look also. I might leave some lined pages for her to put in things she remembers.

If my fingers are on the keyboard they can't be buttering crackers and putting toppings on, then heading towards my mouth then hips. I HAVE MORE WEIGHT I WANT TO LOSE YET. I want to get down to between 75-80 kgs at least. 65 kgs may be too ambitious but you never know.

I have also been crocheting more lap rugs for Hospice. They are done in mohair so are light and warm, soft to the touch and should not irritate fragile skin. I am doing a couple of ones in darker colours that guys may find easier to use.

Today I was at gym before 9 a.m. It was probably the best place to be other than tucked in your bed, which is not productive weight-loss wise, as the rain was coming down torrential and sideways at times. I was glad I had not decided to go for a long walk as I would have looked like a drowned rat.I did my walking at 5 km/hr on a treadmill; made 1.73 km distance at a 1.0 incline for 104 calories. I did some leg and arms weight work also. I could have stayed longer as when I got back Mum decided to stay in bed a little longer. The rain had made her joints very achy. Tonight not a cloud in the sky and it is getting very chilly outside. Occasionally you hear fireworks popping and sometimes, if they let off a fewm you can get to see them.

I am having an egg on gluten free bread for a number of my breakfasts. I want to have a protein drink more often at lunch as I don't feel hungry for a longer time. No nibbling, regular exercise = weight loss starting up again. I wish the pool on the property was heated and under cover. If it was I would be exercising in it year round. We just need a run of warm,fine days and it might get usable. Yesterday I spent the afternoon out in our patio garden re-potting plants, uplifting some bulbs, planting others and re-arranging where the pots were sitting. I also watered the plants earlier in the day and sprayed fish emulsion over all the plants to feed them and get rid of some bug pests. I also rescued and re-used a planter and freesia bulbs that some-one had dumped in the rubbish bin. I don't mind people seeing me retrieve items from the rubbish if they are palnts. I Australia I once retrieved 50 Amaryllis bulbs of all different shadings. we had a beautiful garden after that.

Tomorrow is KIP day so I may or may not get to the gym. If I do my Nanowrimo writing as soon as I finish this blog I may get to bed before 2 a.m. tonight. Take care of yourselves as I take care of me. You never know till you try whether you can do. Whether you believe you can or whether you believe you can't you are right. BELIEVE YOU CAN.

7th October 2014 101.9 kgs today, was 1.3 kgs lighter yesterday

That increase in weight has to mainly be fluid as you don't gain that much that quickly. I expect it to be down again tomorrow. Gym work has been a bit nicer recently as have managed to go at times a lot of other aren't. I actually go into a meditative state usually in the gym as I count my repetitions. I do a lower weight but more repetitions as I am trying to pull my skin back onto my body. Some of the young guys use large weights but less reps. They grunt and groan their way through their program but I find that very distracting to me. The gym is a small one on the housing estate grounds. I miss that meditative state when I can't reach it. I still enjoy the feeling of less fat over my bones and more taut muscle under the fat layer that is still there. 

Summer is coming to New Zealand though and I am looking forward to the times we can go into our pool. At the moment winter is trying to do a late blast and parts of our two largest islands had snow over the weekend. The skiers will love that as they had 45 cms (18 inches) more cover laid down (longer before end of season now). The equinoctial winds we get in October are having fun knocking down power poles in some areas to the dismay of some parents as it is school holidays here (2 weeks). Out of the wind when we sit on our front patio we can get the first start to our new summer tan. The bones and muscles post-gym like the relaxing qualities of the deep warmth too.

I have had fun buying Xmas presents at low prices in the sales most stores have on at the moment while they try to grab the money from the parents through their children's "I want, I need, But everyone else has one" whines. I like to get books and homeware presents for a lot of people but I also like to make some gifts. Initials embroidered for a bookmark seem to be my thing this year. I have done most of one for my mother; need to do outline around it then make up the rest of the bookmark part. I'd like to do one for my brothers as well. We shall see how we go. 

Recently I finished a crocheted blanket for the top of my bed. It is made from mohair or mohair/wool blends. It is warm, light and colourful. I have also done one to give to a friend for Hospice Care and am in the middle of the second one. She gave me a box of mohair wool when she saw I was happy working with it and just asked for "Knee rugs, Please." The lightness and warmth would be perfect for cancer patients as it would not irritate their skin but keep them much warmer. Another of the ladies at KIP (Knitting In Public, held at our local library) offered me 2 cones of mohair she has at home so she  will bring that next fortnight. I don't go to the alternate week at Howick as I now have a writing critique group on the alternate weeks. 5th Tuesday, nothing on. 

I usually enjoy the feeling of being lazy but this time I spring-cleaned my mother's room and our small hallway. I like to thoroughly clean twice a year (Spring and Autumn). The place feels and smells so much better afterwards and it helps me lose weight. I can't eat and clean at the same time and all that cleaning counts as exercise. A double whammy to my body. A good decrease in weight usually too. I love the look of the flat afterwards. Shiny windows, white net curtains, lemon smell of the polish, and if I put the mattress, etc out in the sunshine to sunbathe it comes back in much better. The mattress gets lighter as it gets rid of any moisture  absorbed from drying clothes inside the flat  on very wet days. There is a smell to things that have been in sunshine that I really enjoy.

Do you like the picture above? The photograph is of Piha Beach- a west coast of Auckland surf beach with iron sands as well) that my brother, Dave, took and and got printed in A2 size for my brother, Geoff, as a birthday present. Geoffrey then spent quite a bit of money getting it framed but it is now up on his walls where he can see it everyday. The rock in the center of the bay is called Lion Rock and if you look closely you can see why. It almost looks like a painting but it is definitely an untouched photo. Dave tried many times to get it as good as this and one day the lighting, tide, etc all came together as he wanted. 

Aim before next post:

• lose a kilo a week at least 
• finish spring cleaning of the rest of the flat
• plant out all the bulbs my brother brought for us  the other day
• finish 2 knee rugs before next KIP session (2 weeks away)
• enjoy writing group next week

I'm Back 100.9 kgs and going back to the gym 13/09/14

I did not realize how long it had been since my last post. I had an operation on my right hand for RSI and I have been caught up in that and other things. I am going to get back to writing at least once a week again. My hand has settled and I am awaiting the operation on the second one but that isn't so advanced so I am not worried if it takes another few months before it gets done. I still have to massage over the scar with hand cream regularly to help lessen internal scarring and keep it moving freely, also have to tap it to help in that release.

. 

It did slow me down in going to the gym as a lot of the work I did there involved weights. Even if I used the treadmill or cycle it involved having your hand on the handles etc. I did go but only occasionally. What I did do was try to go for a decent walk most days. I have yo-yoed between 99 -101 kgs recently. I have eaten more. I decided in the end that I was stressed, as all the doctors keep telling you, and I was stress eating. I decided on distraction as a way of not eating in the afternoon which is my worst time. I also need to add more protein at lunch time I think. I am eating too many carbs and it is not satisfying me for any length of time.

My distraction is threefold: 1. crocheting a blanket for me out of all the fluffy wool I have in my stash that will be light and warm for next winter, 2. writing a novel or 2 ( one middle grade age group and the other one I'd like to submit to Ellora's Cave) 3. preparing for the 2 writer's groups I am involved in. I go to a Saturday writer's group that I have been part of for a year and a half. Our next project is to have a novel, or some other writing task we want to do, outlined and organized to go for Nanowrimo in November. That is next weekend so I will spend some time over this coming week organizing for that. I want to complete my goal of writing 50,000+ words this time during Nanowrimo. I feel less guilty about going into my room now for an hour or two in the afternoon and leaving mum in the sitting room. If I go to the gym around 7 am in the morning I will have 60-90 minutes when I get back before I wake mum up at her usual time so will have extra writing time then also.

Our local librarian, who likes to encourage community use of the library facilities, asked if I could start a weekday writers group as well and that has been going for a few months now. We try to discuss an aspect of writing each fortnight and also critique a sample of each other's work. Even now there has been improvement showing. I use iMindMap 7 to do a mindmap of the topic which I hand out. It gives a visual and written summary of the topic. It can be written on too if they want. We discussed plot arcs this week and their use in keeping the story interesting. I learn as I prepare and we try to put into practice in our writing that fortnight what we have learnt. I hope it continues for a long time.

I have more confidence now I am not as large which is funny because I thought I was always confident. Maybe the negative comments I got from random strange people every so often had zapped my confidence. Why people think they have a right to make those nasty comments I don't know. What used to annoy me was the people making them had their own problems that I didn't call them on.

I will also be doing more exercise in the house as I like to do a good spring clean before Xmas and summer so I have started on the sorting out and tossing of old things I no longer need or use. I also wash the walls,floors and ceilings, wash the outside walls and windows, get the garden up to scratch, look through paperwork; sort, tidy, file or dispose of it. I check what Xmas presents I have already brought and see what else I need to get. I start making some Xmas presents to as I like to give a few hand made projects each year to some-one I love. The house cleaning is exercise and the crafting is distraction so I end up losing more weight,Yay.